Okay, so somehow I managed to do the totally wrong assignment for the Writing 101 online course. Well, d’uh. Now you have the reason for the title of today’s post. Well here it is, all that’s on my mind in no particular order and probably not making too much sense.
So I’m in training today for a new software program that my organization has invested in. Last week a bunch of people went and complained about how difficult it was and how it didn’t make any sense. See, this is why I don’t listen to other people. I fell into the abyss of boredom at least twice with people asking questions that have been answered twice and not needing to have my hand held. I am over it. I probably could have figured out how to use this program in a day or so just left on my own to play with it. Ok, so now for the training gossip, cuz who doesn’t love a bit of the naughty stuff, eh? There is a senior manager in the group who was informed of the fact that something we are doing in the organization may not be totally legal or being done in a transparent way. His response was basically, “this is the way we’ve always done it.” He then went on to tell the trainer not to bring up that particular issue when he delivers this course to practitioners. I wanted to totally throw a nerfball at his head. It just sounded so outside of what I’d expect someone who is making close to £100K a year to say. Oh, and if that’s not bad enough, he dresses like he’s 14 and has never had a job before. It is so annoying. I know it is trivial and I know he has kids but I’m sorry, you can’t afford one pair of pants (trousers) that actually fit???? Uh, no! That is total crap especially if your partner works as well. Ok, I’m done. I will be good from now one.
Ok I lied. I refuse to be good. This is my brain fart so I am going to make it loud and truly stinky. LOL! I shouldn’t really, but m’eh. I am going to write badly and use horrible English. Dude, I am trying to write and they are screaming. Screaming! Dear gosh! Can I just say how much it interrupts the creative process when you have people who speak so loudly it is almost screaming????? Argh, can I just say – yeah I said it again – how much it annoys me to be around attention seeking adults. Why does everyone need to know you are in the room??? For goodness sakes! I think people think when I am smiling it is because I agree with what is going on or I think what is going on is amusing. WRONG! Usually they have died horrific cartoon-esque deaths in my head and I am amused by my own dark and malicious humor. Ha! Ha! Not very good for a Social Worker, huh? I have a surprisingly dark, politically incorrect and virtually offensive sense of humor. I would even go so far as to say, at times, it is down right perverse – and I love it! I love that no one can predict – including me – what is going on in my head. I love when random thoughts run through my brain, causing me to smile and it makes someone else smile. If it were a crime they would be complicit – an accessory after the fact. I love that turn people into character criminals. It’s amazing. I made them into offenders of social and political correctness. Ha! Now you’re no better than me even though you’re just smiling to be polite. Mwaaahhahhahaha! I am the kind of criminal that effects others but will never be caught because they don’t know that they are committing crimes. My world is so blissfully dark and amusing.
I got off topic somewhere. What was I talking about? Okay who cares. I think I might have heartburn. That’s what I get for having spicy food for lunch. I wasn’t even really hungry. I just ate because it was lunch time. Do you ever do that? Eat because it’s time, not because you actually want food? It can’t just be me. Well it might be; it’s completely irrelevant.
I am ready to go home. I am considering whether or not I should go to the gym tonight or if I should just ditch and do both workouts tomorrow morning. I am totally not paying attention to this trainer, which isn’t good because my manager is in the room. But, I find she doesn’t notice too much that isn’t glued to her eyelids. Is that mean? LOL! It made me smile. Hmm, I only have a minute of this left and I am afraid I have just scared you all into believing I should be put in a mental hospital. I probably should. I mean I am qualified to make that assessment. I would say I have some sort of personality disorder. I am definitely narcissistic. There might be some other things going on there as well. Too many head traumas? Yeah, that’s in there somewhere. Uh, that’s my time folks. Hope you enjoyed the horrors that spew from my brain when I am told not to use a filter. I shouldn’t be allowed in the company of good people. Peace out homies. ~ Daily Prompt